One Sunday morning, everyone in one bright, beautiful, tiny town got up early and went to the local church. Before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and talking about their lives, their families, etc. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate. Soon everyone was evacuated from the church, except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew, not moving... seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence. Now this confused Satan a bit, so he walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?" The man replied, "Yep, sure do." Satan asked, "Aren't you afraid of me?" "Nope, sure ain't," said the man. Satan was a little perturbed at this and queried, "Why aren't you afraid of me?" The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."
Computer Diagnosis
Wednesday November 11, 2009
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. ''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks." Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message: "Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
Socialize Websites That Pays You
Tuesday October 06, 2009
These websites are 100% FREE; they are like Facebook.com, Myspace.com and Myyearbook.com etc.
6dgr.com PAYS YOU for inviting your friends to sign up on this website using YOUR referral link. This website PAYS YOU for each one of your Down Line Friends who invites theirfriends to sign up on this website using THEIR referral link. &nbs p; & nbsp; A Down Line Friend is someone who signs up on this website using YOUR referral link. &nbs p; & nbsp; Please use my referral link below so I can make some money too
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Yumie.com PAYS YOU for the page views you get i.e. people viewing your profile, blogs, pictures, videos and layouts etc.
This website PAYS YOU for each page views that your Down Line Friends gets.
A Down Line Friend is someone who sign up on this website using YOUR referral link.
Please use my referral link below so I can make some money too
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If you aren’t interested in these money making websites my friend, which is
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time only, then PLEASE forward this email to your friends maybe they
would be interesting in making some FREE money.
Thanks,
Andre.
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